Shower Songs

I like to take long, hot showers. I spend so much time in the shower my wife warns me I’m venturing into prune country. But the shower is where I do my best songwriting. The hot water relaxes me, and the words pour forth. I usually write country songs.

I’m somewhat lacking in the singer-songwriter department as I’m tone deaf. But I like the sound of my voice even if I can’t carry a tune. I can stay in the shower for nearly an hour, which gives me time to work on several sets of my compositions.

I may start out with “Going Through the Motions”: “I walk around and I talk to people as if I was still alive. But I’m just going through the motions.” Country songs can be pretty sad; I try to stay true to the tradition.

My saddest song is not a typical country song—it’s not about lost love. It’s about a guy who lives a quiet life. I sometimes sing it during the “Requests and Dedications” portion of my shower. I call it “Watching TV”.

“My friend Larry is watching TV—he’s trying to get a clue what his life should be. He used to live at home with the folks; he went to work, and he watched TV. Then one day when he was 33, he moved out and got his own place. He went to work and came home to his apartment and watched TV. He was still trying to get a clue what his life should be.”

“Larry” didn’t exactly live the wild bachelor life. He had a few work friends—he was well liked. He didn’t get out much. I saw him once at the mall—he had moved back home. I asked what he was doing these days.

“Oh, you know, going to work, and watching TV. There’s a lot of good stuff on, you know.”

So I think of Larry when I’m singing about other sad people who at least lived enough to have their hearts broken. I sing the song to remind myself that but for the grace of you know who went I. I escaped Larry’s fate twenty years ago when I found the girl who became my wife. Until that time I had spent forty years on the shelf.

So sad songs don’t seem nearly as sad to me as they once did. And “happy songs” just don’t do it for me. I like a good torch song, something that gives you a chance to hit those high, lonesome notes in the shower.

After “Requests and Dedications” and maybe a number where the singer talks a little—I love it when singers talk—I may move on to another favorite: “Recorded Love”. It’s about this fellow whose girl has dumped him. He keeps calling although he knows she won’t pick up-- she has caller ID. All he gets is her recorded voice. He sings: “I could leave you a message, I could give you my recorded love, except I know you don’t want it anymore.” He’s just calling to hear her voice again—even it’s only a record. Gets me every time I sing it.

I often finish my shower with what may be my masterpiece, “Ever Friends, Never Lovers”. “Ever friends, never lovers—that’s how our story ends, or so we tell one another. We can’t love each other, yet we can’t love another.”

This song is a mystery story. Why can’t they love each other? At the end of the song the guy spills his guts: “I remember you when you were a little girl, and I remember the young woman you became. I know why our story ends. I love you too much to ever be your lover. Ever friends, never lovers—that’s how our story ends”.

If I sing a couple choruses of this, I’m an emotional wreck. I have to dry off, and lie down.

But within minutes I’m planning my next shower. I think about what songs to include. I may start off with another favorite, “Falling Again”: “Falling for you again was the last thing on my mind. Falling for you only means falling out of love again.”

Then I’ll probably move on to “It’s All I Can Do: “As I drive through this old town, it’s all I can do not to go by your place. I remember exactly where I was when I got the news that you had stopped loving me. It’s all I can do to watch you with somebody new.” Another heartbreaker.

It’s not all that sad, really—at least the guy wasn’t just watching TV.