Late in my high school career (fourth period, 12:40 PM) I agreed to go on a double date. It seemed like a good idea at the time, though the girl in question was later suspected of being a gang member. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
The date came about mainly because I had a car. A couple of friends, Mike and Sharon, wanted to double date. Sharon's angle was she wanted to go out with Mike who didn't have a driver's license yet. Sharon set me up with Suzy, the new girl in town. This was big of her.
I had agreed to pick up everybody at Sharon’s house. I pulled up in my snazzy 1951 Plymouth and jumped out to open the passenger door for Suzy.
“What are you doing?” Mike asked. Sharon shot him a look as though he might take a lesson. Suzy didn’t seem to be impressed by my gallantry. She was a decent looking girl if you didn't mind a few tattoos.
We were going to a movie at Casey's Fairview Drive-in, a nine-mile trip. We had barely gotten out of the driveway when Suzy decided to light up. There was nothing wrong with that—I smoked myself.
I thought I was a pretty cool smoker. I had a pack of Marlboros hidden in my right sock, which made walking a little tricky. The preferred method, the coolest, was to have the pack rolled up in your T-shirt sleeve. That wouldn’t have worked for me, as I didn’t want my folks to know I was smoking.
Mike and I decided to light up as well. He had a decent lighter. I carried a box of matches, which meant my sock runneth over. Suzy dug an industrial strength Zippo and a pack of Camels out of her purse.
Of course I had to keep driving while lighting up--something I overlooked when I bent down to get my cigarettes. I felt a sudden flash around my eyebrows. Suzy’s lighter—a blowtorch really—had singed me.
I handled it well. My car was equipped with an emergency brake that I managed to engage while trying to see if I had any eyebrows left. The sudden braking pitched us all forward. Then the car, which seemed to be operating on its own, took off for a block or so before the brake kicked in again.
After a couple of blocks of me riding the Plymouth like a bucking horse, Mike finally yelled, “Shoot it—kill it—turn it off!” We were on a quiet residential street—nobody was hurt unless you counted my eyebrows.
We pressed on to the drive-in, which was just out of town next to the cornfields. I found a parking place and rolled the window down to attach the speaker that was mounted on a post.
The posts were planted in gravel with a splash of crabgrass that attracted local livestock, who generally grazed there during the day. Usually by show time they were in bed, but occasionally a cow would appear at the snack bar and order popcorn.
I had just got the speaker sound adjusted when Suzy announced she was going to the snack bar to make a phone call. Sharon tagged along.
The girls had barely got out of the car when Mike said: “You wanna kill her, or do you want me to?” He was speaking of Sharon, of course, who had engineered this double date from hell.
In a few minutes Sharon came back. She had overheard enough to learn that Suzy was planning to meet another girl who had just escaped from the State Home For Budding Gang Girls. Sounded like they had big plans to start their own sewing circle. Sharon said we had to get Suzy back to her foster parents and call them later about their would-be runaway.
We then sat through a double feature of "Reform School Girls" and "The Explosive Generation" shown in thrilling black and white. Suzy seemed to be rooting for the bad girls. During dramatic moments she would fish out her Camels. Just to be on the safe side, I hugged the driver’s seat window whenever she fired up.
We got Suzy back to her foster parents, but we weren’t looking forward to seeing her at school, as she would know we had turned her in. We figured she had gang member friends—Sharks or Jets—who would be looking us up. But we never saw her again. The rumor was she was sent up the river, or to reform school as we used to call it.
The following year I thought I saw her again; she seemed to be in a movie called "Gang Girls Behind Bars". She was obviously playing herself. I noticed the other actors gave her a wide berth. Especially when she lit up.
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
William Henry Harrison, or Old Tippecanoe (1773-1841)
William Henry Harrison became President because he was a war hero. His campaign slogan was “Tippecanoe and Tyler Too”, which came from the battle of the same name. This battle or skirmish in 1811 involved 700 Indians under the command of Tecumseh's little brother, who was called The Prophet because Tenskwatawa was too hard to spell.
Many details have been lost in “the fog of war”, but Harrison was clearly the hero on the scene thanks to a pool of embedded reporters. American was a young country that was nervous about its future, particularly in 1811 when everybody knew the War of 1812 was scheduled. So a future leader was born.
Thirty years later, Harrison became the first man to campaign openly for the presidency.[i] (He was out of a job at the time.) He had been in Congress and most notably had been the Governor of The Indiana Territory, which included the future states of Indiana, Illinois, Michigan, Wisconsin, and the eastern part of Minnesota, the Land of the Lakes Trading Post and Souvenir Center, and anything else not nailed down.
The campaign was notable for suggesting that Harrison was brought up in a log cabin and was just an ordinary Joe. This was not quite accurate in that Harrison came from a Virginia family of means. He even went to a sort of prep school, something like the Leander Smith Fairchild School for Sissies. When Harrison was shown an actual log cabin of the type he had claimed to have lived in, he fainted dead away.
Harrison, our 9th President, set several records for the Presidency including dying in office after only 31 days. “Old Tipp” (short for Tippecanoe) was actually the oldest president elected (67), a record that stood until Ronald Wilson “The Gipper” Reagan was elected in 1980.
On a cold, windy March day Harrison made news again by giving the longest inaugural address in history, over 8,000 words. He would have gone on even longer, if his teleprompter hadn’t malfunctioned. It took Harrison over two hours to read his speech; he had forgotten his overcoat and managed to catch a very bad cold.
His advance men neglected to make arrangements for a canopy to shelter him, but the balloons they ordered showed up three hours after the speech was over, so it wasn’t a complete failure.
During Harrison’s brief tenure in office no states entered the union and he appointed no Supreme Court judges, so you can’t say he didn’t accomplish anything.
Much of his time was taken over by office seekers who stormed the White House the month he was President. (Several good post office jobs were up for grabs.)
But mainly he was trying to get over his cold. Many medical experts were consulted including barbers who did a little medical work on the side such as blood letting. One suggested therapy was the use of snakes. (A Harvard man thought this was a good idea.)
Eventually, however, nothing worked and Harrison went on to The Happy Hunting Ground of Warriors that he had fought against.
Harrison today is largely forgotten; a hint of his future obscurity was provided the day he died by ex-President Andrew Jackson, who was taking a nap at the time. When told the news about Harrison, Jackson said: “President Who?”
[i] The Founding Fathers had stayed at home and filed their nails, but they kept their cell phones handy so they could answer their country’s call.
Many details have been lost in “the fog of war”, but Harrison was clearly the hero on the scene thanks to a pool of embedded reporters. American was a young country that was nervous about its future, particularly in 1811 when everybody knew the War of 1812 was scheduled. So a future leader was born.
Thirty years later, Harrison became the first man to campaign openly for the presidency.[i] (He was out of a job at the time.) He had been in Congress and most notably had been the Governor of The Indiana Territory, which included the future states of Indiana, Illinois, Michigan, Wisconsin, and the eastern part of Minnesota, the Land of the Lakes Trading Post and Souvenir Center, and anything else not nailed down.
The campaign was notable for suggesting that Harrison was brought up in a log cabin and was just an ordinary Joe. This was not quite accurate in that Harrison came from a Virginia family of means. He even went to a sort of prep school, something like the Leander Smith Fairchild School for Sissies. When Harrison was shown an actual log cabin of the type he had claimed to have lived in, he fainted dead away.
Harrison, our 9th President, set several records for the Presidency including dying in office after only 31 days. “Old Tipp” (short for Tippecanoe) was actually the oldest president elected (67), a record that stood until Ronald Wilson “The Gipper” Reagan was elected in 1980.
On a cold, windy March day Harrison made news again by giving the longest inaugural address in history, over 8,000 words. He would have gone on even longer, if his teleprompter hadn’t malfunctioned. It took Harrison over two hours to read his speech; he had forgotten his overcoat and managed to catch a very bad cold.
His advance men neglected to make arrangements for a canopy to shelter him, but the balloons they ordered showed up three hours after the speech was over, so it wasn’t a complete failure.
During Harrison’s brief tenure in office no states entered the union and he appointed no Supreme Court judges, so you can’t say he didn’t accomplish anything.
Much of his time was taken over by office seekers who stormed the White House the month he was President. (Several good post office jobs were up for grabs.)
But mainly he was trying to get over his cold. Many medical experts were consulted including barbers who did a little medical work on the side such as blood letting. One suggested therapy was the use of snakes. (A Harvard man thought this was a good idea.)
Eventually, however, nothing worked and Harrison went on to The Happy Hunting Ground of Warriors that he had fought against.
Harrison today is largely forgotten; a hint of his future obscurity was provided the day he died by ex-President Andrew Jackson, who was taking a nap at the time. When told the news about Harrison, Jackson said: “President Who?”
[i] The Founding Fathers had stayed at home and filed their nails, but they kept their cell phones handy so they could answer their country’s call.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Boundless
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
“Boundless is an album by Finnish a cappella ensemble Rajaton, released in 2001.”
For those of you who are behind in your Finnish acapella news, this department (Shipping and Shoelaces) has a report on “Boundless” by Rajaton. Below is a rundown on several tracks that look promising.
1. Butterfly
This track explores the life of a poor butterfly who gets lost at the mall. She has no credit cards or cash so she has to fly back to Finland. “Life is hard!” she sings after stopping at London to refuel.
2. Un-Wishing Well
This song is based on the famous folk tale about young lovers who make a wish to live happily ever after. As luck would have it, they made their wish at the Un-Wishing Well and were struck dead by Topher, the god of Water Rights.
3. The Lark in the Clear Air
This soaring rendition concerns the Lark who never flies in bad weather; he is known to call the airport prior to takeoff. Since 1994 larks worldwide have been grounded.
4. We Walk in a Fog
This track concerns a group of friends who do everything together, as they fear they may somehow be parted. When the fog rolls in, they join hands and sing. We understand this sounds better in Finnish.
5. Dobbin's Flowery Vale
Irish folk music has never sounded so lilting as in this tale of Dobbin, a poor student who picked flowers in the vale for his love, who being allergic, sued him for all he was worth. He spent the rest of his days singing “O my flowery vale” over and over. Neighbors grew sick of this and had him shot.
6. Armahan Kulku (The Lover's Path). This thrilling song is enhanced by being performed in its original Finnish version. It concerns a couple who make a wrong turn on the highway of love.
7. Kaipaava (Longing)
The best track was saved for last as Longing, or unrequited love on a cracker, is practically the national anthem of Finland. The arrangement by Wuorela and Chydenius, the Simon and Garfunkle of Europe, is possiby their best work to date. Although purists might prefer their rousing version of “I am, I said to the chair that wasn’t there.”
If you find that this album merely whets your appetite for the Finnish acapella of Ragaton, you may want to check out their latest work, Out of Bounds (2006). To quote from the album notes:
“The English texts are not direct translations. In the first two, Stephen Hatfield attempted to write English lyrics that matched many of the vowel sounds in the Finnish versions.”
Oh, bring it on.
“Boundless is an album by Finnish a cappella ensemble Rajaton, released in 2001.”
For those of you who are behind in your Finnish acapella news, this department (Shipping and Shoelaces) has a report on “Boundless” by Rajaton. Below is a rundown on several tracks that look promising.
1. Butterfly
This track explores the life of a poor butterfly who gets lost at the mall. She has no credit cards or cash so she has to fly back to Finland. “Life is hard!” she sings after stopping at London to refuel.
2. Un-Wishing Well
This song is based on the famous folk tale about young lovers who make a wish to live happily ever after. As luck would have it, they made their wish at the Un-Wishing Well and were struck dead by Topher, the god of Water Rights.
3. The Lark in the Clear Air
This soaring rendition concerns the Lark who never flies in bad weather; he is known to call the airport prior to takeoff. Since 1994 larks worldwide have been grounded.
4. We Walk in a Fog
This track concerns a group of friends who do everything together, as they fear they may somehow be parted. When the fog rolls in, they join hands and sing. We understand this sounds better in Finnish.
5. Dobbin's Flowery Vale
Irish folk music has never sounded so lilting as in this tale of Dobbin, a poor student who picked flowers in the vale for his love, who being allergic, sued him for all he was worth. He spent the rest of his days singing “O my flowery vale” over and over. Neighbors grew sick of this and had him shot.
6. Armahan Kulku (The Lover's Path). This thrilling song is enhanced by being performed in its original Finnish version. It concerns a couple who make a wrong turn on the highway of love.
7. Kaipaava (Longing)
The best track was saved for last as Longing, or unrequited love on a cracker, is practically the national anthem of Finland. The arrangement by Wuorela and Chydenius, the Simon and Garfunkle of Europe, is possiby their best work to date. Although purists might prefer their rousing version of “I am, I said to the chair that wasn’t there.”
If you find that this album merely whets your appetite for the Finnish acapella of Ragaton, you may want to check out their latest work, Out of Bounds (2006). To quote from the album notes:
“The English texts are not direct translations. In the first two, Stephen Hatfield attempted to write English lyrics that matched many of the vowel sounds in the Finnish versions.”
Oh, bring it on.
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